Break and Progress

I am having a wonderful, relaxing, family-filled break! I took Friday the 17th off and spent the day with Leah then picked up Hannah and Joel at the airport late that night (which went as smoothly as it possibly could). Spent that afternoon and evening with my Dad and Jean. The next day we got up and had Christmas at the Lake with the Kuenzi's and Clarks. This is always a special day but for some reason, this one was even more special. I loved spending time with Shari and her kids and Season and everyone! We had an especially good Smith family Christmas also at Wooten's. Then Christmas here was very low key. This year I never got around to putting up lights or decorations of any kind (I did win a poinsetta for Christmas from work) or even a tree. I didn't shop until I absolutely had to and never shopped for the kids at all--we wrote them checks and they were happy! Christmas day was about relaxing and eating. Scott made a traditional Fire Department breakfast of sausage, biscuits and gravy, eggs, and hash browns. Leah had brought homemade cinnamon rolls. Then we just hung out. The whole time the kids have been here is laid back and relaxed. We hang out as a family or in smaller groups but there isn't any pressure so I feel like I go off and read or go to the gym or nap or whatever. I've discovered Pinterest and spent some time doing that and did some crafts, painted the hallway and trim, stuff like that. We try to go to the gym (Scott, Hannah, Leah and I) every day if we can together. The kids have had time with their friends, too. Very enjoyable times. Joel's friends have hung out but not too much--enough that he feels reconnected and home. Scott and I have had time together, too, which will help with the transition back to the two of us. Jon is moving out into an apartment so it will be very quiet around here for awhile after the kids leave. And they are leaving little by little instead of all at once, too, which will help. We are getting ready to head into craziness as I go get mom tomorrow and then I understand that Jon is on his way back from Mexico and then on Sunday, the Griffiths are coming up for the day with maybe some Clarks and Kuenzi's also! Gonna be exciting! Then I have Monday and then boom! The girls go to Newton and I go back to work! Joel will go with them for an overnight then come back and be here until he flies out Friday (or Saturday--can't remember). Of course, the house will still be getting worked on.
Progress on the house: Got the roof onto the new room and most of the siding and the windows in. Today got the sliding door in the kitchen! It looks amazing! Makes the room look much bigger! I got the hallway painted including the trim and doors (still need some of the trim put up). I guess we've turned a corner and I would put the house at about 65% done.
Wow! Scott and Hannah ran to the store and I just realized I'm alone for the first time in a long time. Nope, Leah got here. Now to start cooking (again:)--the grocery bill is HUGE!)

Eating Frenzy

Once I get in an eating mode, I can't get out. Today I have eaten:

6:30 a.m. Coffee with hazelnut creamer
7;00 a.m. Staff Christmas party: some sort of muffin, 2 helpings egg casserole, some sort of fruit punch.
10 a.m. poppy seed muffin, more egg casserole, more fruit punch
11 a.m. strawberry chocolate fudge (Christmas gift)
12 p.m. Large peice of fried chicken, cheesy mashed potatoes, tortilla chips, chocolate covered peanuts
2:30 p.m. strawberry chocolate fudge
4:00 p.m. post nap pre work out snack--tortilla chips
At this point I did attend spinning class where I gave about 80% effort and then sat in the sauna for 15 minutes
7 p.m. dinner spaghetti with wheat noodles and meat sauce, milk, two peices of dark chocolate almond (hey--I need antioxidants!)
7:30 strawberry chocolate fudge

This is ridiculous.

ER today

Ok, so today I went to the ER having Scott sure I had a heart attack. After lunch, I had this HORRIBLE pain in my stomach. I popped a couple of antacids and then a couple more and went to lay on my bed. I yelled to Scott that I thought I need to throw up but he was in the bathroom so I went upstairs. I had my pants down because they were pressing on my stomach and then even took them off and laid on the floor. I was in AGONIZING pain. I told the girls to get Scott and by the time he got to me, I was sweating from every pour of my body and the world was swirling around and then my arms and legs, mostly my arms and fingers got super tingly. Scott looked for the phone to call 911 but then I felt a bit better so I got my pants back on (which was my main concern if an ambulance was coming) and was able to walk back downstairs and lay on the bed. Soctt said I'd had the exact symptoms of a heart attack so even though I felt better, he convinced me to go to the ER. This is a guy who NEVER goes to the doctor (well, except to get surgeries:) The ER did an EKG and labwork and said I was fine. I came home and ran errands but I did skip going to the gym, mostly because I didn't want to run into anyone who saw me at the ER a few hours earlier:)
I am now making my official own diagnosis: I had a HORRIBLE gas attack and then probably hyperventilated. Don't worry, I'll follow up with my doctor.

Perfect Days

Yesterday, Friday, I took off work and slept in til about 8:30. When I got up, there were guys working on the new room outside and Rex the contractor was here! I got to talk to him about where we are with the renovation progress and it made me feel hopeful:). I had my quiet time and took a bath in my wonderful new bathtub and got dressed in my wonderful new walk in closet then ran to the bank and grand ol trunk and left town! It was sunny and mild out. I got to the Sprint store in Topeka to get my phone fixed and instead of waiting 2 hours as I expected, there were 4 guys waiting for customers! It only took 30 seconds for him to fix my phone! So I took off for KC and picked up my Leah at David's house in KC! We did a little Christmas shopping and then went to see my Dad and Jean. My Dad is hilarious. We went to the little coffee shop at Aberdeen and drank cappacino then went back to the apartment and took naps. I even woke myself up snoring! When we went to dinner, walking down the hall a guy came by and my Dad called, "Hi Henry" to him and he said, "Hi Dick". I was impressed and said to Jean, "He knows their names!" She said, "No, that's Wes. He calls them all Henry." I laughed so hard! On the way to dinner my Dad told us about 6 times that if we didn't like what was on the menu, we could order steak. We had a wonderful meal of brisket and scalloped potatoes and apple pie then went back to the apartment and watched "Elf". About 9:30 we left for the airport and picked up Hannah and Joel! I was expecting their flight to be super late and it was basically on time! I love being with my kids so I was already happy and content hanging out with Leah and I got all three! We had fun in the car talking and laughing at Joel who couldn't hear out of his right ear from the plane and he kept talking really softly. We got back to the house at a reasonable 12:45 and Joel's friends were over to greet him. Got to bed about 1:30.
Today was wonderful also! The guys were here early putting up walls so I got up about 8:30 again and had my quiet time. Lele got up pretty early with me, too. We got dressed and other than a key fiasco and great difficulty getting Joel up, left for the lake at a reasonable time. Christmas at the Lake day--a Clark family tradition! This one was particularly fun with excellent fellowship. All of the Kuenzi's were there (with the exception of Kevin--sad). We love hanging out with the Kuenzi's and Lauren and Season added to the enjoyment of the day. The meal was delish as usual and the games fun. Then we all just sat around and talked and laughed! Toward the end we were working on our dance moves and tried to do the "stanky leg" and were horrible dancers. We got home at a decent time and the girls went running and I ran on the treadmill at the gym. I feel like this time with everyone home will be relaxed and non stressful. A great day!

Lately

Hello blogger followers who are mostly my family:). Sorry I blog so sporadically. A lot going on lately with the house and it takes all my attention. That and my back has hurt for about 5 weeks now. But it is better--at about 90% which means I can finally work out again! I went to induro spinning today. We went to Ireland--beautiful! Right now I am sitting at my new kitchen island and I have fiber one blueberry muffins in the oven. I prepared them using the light above the stove and I have on the fan above the stove--both features I've never had before. And the dishwasher is quietly purring away--it used to be that I couldn't really cook or do anything in the kitchen when the dishwasher was running because I had to drag the whole machine over and hook it up to the faucet. Really, I feel like I'm living in luxury! I went to the grocery store today and put the groceries away in the beautiful double door fridge and the pantry:). If I want to later, I can fill up my giant tub and read in there then walk into my giant walk in closet to get my jammies on. I put a hook for my robe right over the heat vent so its always toastie when I put it on:). I think the guys are coming to lay the carpet in there tomorrow then I'll really feel like I'm in luxury. Speaking of luxury! My mom and I are planning another resort trip! This one to jamaica! It looks unbelievable! I'm so spoiled! The kids are coming home in 5 days! I'm terribly excited! I haven't done a doggone thing for Christmas--not one thing. I haven't baked, bought a single gift, sent a card or decorated. I guess it will be a "participatory" year. We did go to a Christmas party last night which was fun. I usually do not like parties where I have to dress up and people act all fake and nice but this one was good. It was put on by MCC for the staff. Scott and I got on our nice clothes (in our new spa bathroom and walk in closet:) and were treated to a fabulous steak and salmon dinner complete with cherries jubilee and bananas foster (yes, I had both deserts or is it desserts). Then we watched the best Christmas program I've ever seen. Just 6 students who did simple but truly inspiring and worshipful Christmas music with meaningful short skits in between. I was impressed. It helped so much with my bah humbug attitude. I'm counting on the kids to want to do all the Christmas preparations together. I also hope the kids won't mind "participating" in the renovation while they are here. I need some input on the paint colors for the hallway, kitchen, dining room, and trim. And then help actually painting them! Then maybe we can put the Christmas tree up and decorate! Sometimes I feel like there is so much more to do on the house and then other times I think, my goodness, this could be done so soon! Here is what is done: The repairs to the big room walls and ceiling upstairs, the entire upstairs bathroom, the main bathroom (all except the glass shower walls), the walk in closet (sans carpet), the kitchen counters and countertops and appliances, the foundation laid for the new addition. What is left to do: demo the closets in the master bedroom and repair the walls and ceiling in there and put up the new lights and ceiling fan. In the kitchen, paint, backsplash, sliding glass door, some sheetrock, and trim. The new room has the foundation laid so it will need the heating and air, electricity and walls put up then the wall removed, the big window moved and french doors put in, then redecorate the front room entirely and refinish all the floors. And repair the windows in the front and put in the front door insert, repair the stairs and build the portico. Ok, upon reexamination, I guess we are only about 50% done. I did show Scott what I wanted for Christmas: slippers so he bought them and some pj's for the dogs! I told my mom I wanted rugs for the bathroom so she said buy them so we did! I hope they are the right color. Need input! ok, blogger people, I'll try to blog again soon.

Christmas X 3

So I've waited and waited and all on the same day, I get my appliances, my toilet back, and the bathroom AND kitchen sinks hooked up! What are the chances? So I got home from work (an exhausting day, I might add) and there were trucks and vans parked all down the block--all for us! I came in and Rex the contractor was in the kitchen and there were boxes and plastic everywhere and two plumbers in the bathroom working under the sink and going in and out the door--there may have been three or four. I changed my clothes and then left for the chiropractor and bank. Got back and Rex was tidying up. The fridge amazes me! It has huge doors and tons of space. I can put the milk in the door! Rex will hook up the water and ice (on the door) tomorrow! Rex left and of course, I had to try out the new toilet right away! One tiny touch and swoosh! When you've lived with old plumbing you can really appreciate these new toilets! I recycled cardboard boxes and put trash out for about an hour. Then I moved the stuff back under the kitchen sink and moved all the fridge stuff into the new fridge. Got done with that and was HUNGRY. The stove still isn't hooked up because it needs a cord so I got chipotle. But I ate it at the new kitchen island! I put my pots and pans that were dirty from the construction in the new dishwasher and set it running. So quiet! And it holds a bunch! THen I cleaned up the dush in the bathroom and cleaned the 5 foot mirror and moved my bathroom stuff (all but the shower items) into the cupboards and new linen closet in the bathroom. Oh that reminds me! Need to search out some of Leah's cool pottery to put in the bathroom. Its going to look so cool in the bathroom and kitchen. I already found a couple of cups Leah made that were the exact colors of the new bathroom upstairs and they look awesome! I'll have o frame up some of Hannah's paintings for the dining room and the new room addition when its all done. Maybe I'll contract with her for a cool sculpture for the front lawn too! This is too exciting! I felt like Christmas morning!

Perspective

After I hit "publish now" on my blogs, my perspective often changes. God does that, too, when I give things over to Him. "Moreover, let us be full of joy now, let us exult and triumph in our troubles and rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that pressure and affliction and hardship produce patient and unswerving endurance. And endurance develops maturity of character (approved faith and tried integrity). And character produces the habit of joyful and confident hope of eternal salvation." Romans 5:3-4. Friday is the day I pray for healing. I have family members with Alzheimers, some with depression, some with horrible cancer, some with addictions, some who've lost a husband and father, many who don't have the love and comfort of Christ, and here I am stressing over a renovation. Perspective.

An Exercise in Patience

I have two major character flaws (and a bunch more but these are the ones God is honing right now): a lack of patience and inability to deal with change. I am NOT ungrateful. This renovation is really stretching me. When I talk about it seeking support and understanding, people are incredulous that I'm not focused on the end result. It comes down to these two basic flaws. The work seems to be moving at a snails pace. We started mid summer and the only thing complete is the upstairs bathroom. It is beautiful, I am really happy with it! Currently, I have been without a toilet on the main floor for more than six weeks. I tromp through the entire house to use the bathroom in the basement in the middle of the night. We have no water at all on the main floor now and will not for about 6 weeks. I tromp up the stairs to get water for coffee and for the dog bowl each morning. We cook in a microwave and eat on paper plates. I don't know why I can't pull the adventurous side of me out. Sometimes I can see the humor in it and I try to stay focused on the end result and the progress each day but I am struggling to near tears daily. The kitchen cabinets came in and they are beautiful, really, beautiful. We will love the island. We will love the triangle work space. But I didn't plan it well, there is no place to put the dishes near the dishwasher and the food pantry is far from the cooking area. When I packed up the old kitchen, I took about 3 trunk loads of stuff to give away. So the other night I started putting away dishes and food and unpacking boxes of kitchen stuff. I got the cabinets almost full and I was only about halfway through the boxes. I will have to be really creative and give away a bunch more stuff. I do like the idea of living with less things but this is stressful to sort out! I've had a stressful few weeks at work and I really need to have time to relax and take care of me. I haven't gotten to work out this week which is probably good because I fried my back dragging the kitchen floor to the dump wagon this last weekend. I know, its going to be great. I just want my toilet back. A sink on the main floor would be nice. Did I mention I don't like shopping or decorating? Only about 4 billion more decorating decisions to make and this will be done. I really do sound ungrateful, don't I? Character changes are hard. Pray for patience and flexibility for me please.

A Beautiful Fall Walk

I was exhausted when I got home today so decided to sleep as long as I could, even if I slept into my gym class. I woke up at 5:10 and had a snack then hitched up the dogs and took them for a walk around the park. Just a good, old fashioned walk. They are in terrible shape so they pulled and tugged and strained because they were so excited to get away from the contractor and all his banging and buzzing and get outside, but then they crapped out and strolled the rest of the way around city park. It was the perfect temperature and the big leaves were floating in the air and crunching at my feet.
Now I'm home sitting on the front porch away from the dust of the renovation. It is dusk and it is still warm. My phone said it was 83 degrees when I left work today. Now there is the perfect breeze. I still have on shorts and a t shirt. I have some real food on the grill and in the microwave (no soup or fast food tonight--we are living it up!)
Today was day one of Red Ribbon Week. I was so stressed out, but praise God, it all did turn out ok. We had a guest instructor from my gym teach the kids in 1st and 2nd hour PE some Body Jam. They were reluctant but then they really got into it! Then a gal from the Extension Office taught half the 8th graders to make a healthy snack. The other half of the 8th graders did yoga in they gym and I heard it was a giant hit. The 7th graders had a mental health lesson and a stress relief day where they had relaxation. Tomorrow its more of the same but turbo kick instead. Then Thursday I feed them oatmeal and Friday the all school party where we have special activities and sign a banner and give out toothbrushes and floss.
It was also safety week and we had a giant fire drill complete with smoke and a debriefing with the fire department. Tomorrow is a tornado drill, Wednesday an evacuation drill, Thursday lock out and Friday lock down. On top of this today we had a kid who faked a heart attack because she wanted to go home. Lovely, just lovely.
So, I am enjoying a little relaxation of my own on the front porch tonight. And I will enjoy those pork chops and sweet potato too.

My Dad

Now I'm at my Dad's. Drove up here from Newton.
My Dad is doing great. He's settled in here at Aberdeen and even though he's lonely and doesn't feel a real connection to the people here yet (other than all the women who are crazy about him), he's making the best of it. He goes to swim aerobics three times a week and played golf with his old friends the last two weeks. He walks to the grocery store even though it is hard for him to find his way back to the same door.
Alzheimer's is interesting. It forces one to be really present in the now. Dad doesn't have much memory for 5 minutes ago, earlier today, or yesterday or last week. But he remembers random, insignificant facts, like that none of the kids or me used to like salad. I am so proud of how Dad copes with his memory loss--you can tell he used to be a manager because he constantly problem solves. He doesn't get impatient with himself when he can't remember. His personality has mellowed. He doesn't get snappy or stressed. He's kept his sense of humor and fun and is up for doing about anything. He just handles all these changes that have been thrust upon him. He is very loving and affectionate and appreciative. I enjoy spending time with him.

Today

So today I got up at 8 and got ready and drove to Newton to see Leah. Fall fest! I also knew my old friend, Lori, would be in town. We hadn't seen each other in 15 years and hadn't talked in that long too! I found her recently on facebook so that's how I knew she was coming to Newton. She lost her husband, Mike, also our friend from college, to a brain anuerism 4 1/2 years ago. Leah and I walked to Mojo's and ran into David on the way. I had amish egg casserole--yummy and a cinnamon roll that Leah had made and coffee. It was raining when we came out. I had called and texted Lori and no answer so we walked around and finally found her! It was as if no time at all had passed! She lives in New York--in the Hamptons. It sounds amazing--the beach, surrounded by farms and near enough to explore the city. She invited me to come next summer! We walked around and talked and listened to jazz in the tent and went to Mojo's with Leah and with Maggie, her neice, who is Leah's mod mate! It is a truly small world. I love friends that you can see after that long and take up right where you left off.

More USC

A zillion bikes and skateboards whizzing along wide sidewalks with brick decorations. Lots of fountains, trees, grass, flowers. Many asian students, lots of security guards. Joel lives by an interesting intersection that runs quickly through the cars' turns then a sound happens and all the pedestrians, skateboarders and bicylists go at once, including diagonally. There's a cool tree with intricate roots all sticking above ground. Joel walks by his friend Alicia, Marianne and Carly's apartment on the way to his and he stops in often when they are home. They are nice, friendly girls. Joel's roommates are Sam, who is dark haired and wears put together, pressed clothes, perfect hair, shaved and has a sassy side. Nate is small and wears dark glasses and is very sweet and funny. Forrest is unshaven like Joel and is in interactive with Joel.
Today I sat in the perfect, sunny weather on a bench on campus near perfectly groomed green grass and watched Joel play quidditch. I enjoyed it very much. Lots of interesting people walked by--asian guys in suits with briefcases and cell phones. Skater guys on trick bikes with the giant earrings in their earlobes. Girls in low cut tops and mini skirts. Guys in pajama pants. A girl with a case of beer. And lots of regular looking college kids too.
After quidditch we walked over to Chipotle which I'd eaten at before when I came with Joel to orientation. The prices were a full dollar lower than at home! We sat outside and Juan came down (he lives upstairs of Chipotle). I liked him very much. He is older, has been in the army. Joel stayed with him this summer. He looks out for Joel. We walked to the cinema school lab and watched the short film that Joel and Juan made recently starring Joel. It starts in a forest with Joel looking around and he finds a table. When he puts his hand on the table, he is transported to a beach! The table is there so he touches it again and transports to a parking garage. He touches it successively and is transported each time to a different location instantly--one of which was a glass sided elevator going down!
We walked back to the apartment and sat around with Nate, Forrest and Alicia who were studying then Joel and I sat by the pool where we napped and I read. It was a tiny bit cool so we changed to jeans and walked to catch the shuttle to downtown LA to watch a movie--only the shuttle wasn't running! We walked to Dominoes and got pizza and sat outside the Zumekis center and ate. We walked back to the apartment and stopped by to visit awhile with the girls and Nate and Forrest were there too. We went back to the apartment and Joel played smash brothers.

Joel

Oh, Joel, I am so proud of you! You came across the US to places completely unknown and made a great place for yourself. You have such nice roommates, kind, approachable, comfortable and you have tons of great friends who appreciate you for who you are. You have welcomed me here with open arms and made my stay comfortable and enjoyable. You made a cozy place for me to sleep (in the closet) and knowing you, you were providing me with the very best since you love to sleep in closets! I love that your apartment is quiet, relaxing, serene, even mostly clean! (Except your room, of course). Last night when you wer filming your thriller video with your roommates, it was just like when you used to play pretend and giggle with your friends only now you have a real camera and lights You are so in your element. And I love that you are on the quidditch team! So perfect! I'm proud of you for pursuing this fraternity (co-ed--also so you) and being a part of a social community. You make great choices! You are an amzing person. I'm proud to be your mom.

LA Treasures Conference

About noon, got in the taxi at USC and off I went on the 405 freeway and then the 101, past the Hollywood sign on the hill to Van Nuys Blvd. I ate lunch in the cab and looked at sights and watched the video posted on the back of the seat. The taxi got to the address and I swiped my credit card ($60!) and he gave me my suitcase and left. I looked around and saw nothing. I finally found a sign that had fallen over. I was in the right place! I went upstairs and registered and waited and talked to the gal at the table. Other women started showing up. I had worn the right clothes--my jeans and flat shoes and fluffy blouse. About 25 women were there but no one sat by me. We introduced ourselves and everyone else were from larger cities. Most had come in groups but a few came alone. Some where women who had worked in the sex industry. We were all there for a purpose--to reach out to girls in the clubs who are hurting and need Jesus.

I was distracted from the start having just left Joel at USC, all that is going on at home with my parents, and not feeling real well from a cold. They talked about the ministry and the outreach and I couldn't concentrate well. I was concerned about how I would get back to the hotel for the break. I needed food and rest and to regroup and freshen up. When they started talking about the actual outreach and what we would see in the clubs--full nudity, lap dances, and that we'd be going into "hostess clubs" or brothels, I started to feel afraid. What in the world was I doing here? I wanted to skip the outreach part and I considered just staying at the hotel. So when the afternoon ended, I stood up and asked if anyone was going to the hotel. A lady Pastor said she was so I rode back. I tried to rest, called home to check on Dad, ate some food from the vending machine and washed my face and changed into a black jacket and my boots and jeans and went back to the Treasures office. I still felt distracted and scared and did NOT want to see anyone doing a naked lap dance!
When I got there, there was a gal sitting alone and I remembered she'd said she'd been in the industry previously and she'd come alone too. She looked terrified. I went over to her and asked if she was ok. She said she wanted to leave, that she wasn't like the other girls and she had no idea why she was there. I told her I felt the exact same way! I started saying all the exact things I need to hear myself--that God wanted her there for a reason and that He knew what her purpose was--maybe she could reach the girls no one else could! Then another girl, Sharon, who was all put together and confident looking came over and said she was scared too! We all prayed together. We all worshipped as a group and it helped me focus some and calm down some. Then we all stood and they asked for volunteers to pray. Usually, God lays it on my heart to pray but for some reason, He didn't at all that weekend. We prayed for the bouncers, managers, house moms, the team, the girls on the team who'd be going back into the clubs for the first time after leaving the industry, all the girls in the clubs and over the gifts bags themselves. They told us that we were to just give the gifts to the girls and express unconditional love toward them. I felt weird about this because I was leaving and would never see them again but they explained that we were to gain trust for Treasures in general.
We divided up into two shuttles. One would go to downtown LA and mine was headed to Hollywood, Sunset Strip and West LA. I was excited to see these places I've never been. I sat on the shuttle with Sharon, a neat gal who is head of a ministry that encourages women to be in the Word. I shared my story with her and tried to stay focused but I did keep breaking their rules by texting the family.
We paired up and took turns going into the clubs to give the gifts to the girls. The bags had lip gloss, cool earrings and a card with the website on it that just said, "You are loved, you are valued and you are a treasure." I went up to the club doors twice but never went in. We were 100% successful at getting all our gift bags accepted. Some of the girls were able to go inside the clubs. Harmony was able to have a good conversation with one of the dancers who told her she would for sure call the number. One of the former dancers in the shuttle shared how freeing it was to have gone back into the club after leaving the industry 17 years ago.
At the second club, I looked in as the door opened just for a moment and saw the girls projected in sillouette on a large screen and I realized that God wasn't going to have me go in to the club for a reason. Having grown up with a dad who had difficulty showing me love and then going through the divorce, the promiscuity (even though I saved actual intercourse until college) and the abortion, I feel like I am just now healing as a fully sexual person. I am really for the first time truly understanding how wonderful married sex can be. I think that God didn't want to ruin that.
The second day of the conference, I learned tons. The biggest thing I learned is that when mentoring these girls who have such incredible, overwhelming needs, we don't have to have the answers nor do we need to take responsibility for their recovery. God will do a work in them and transform them. Our role is to love them unconditionally, model healthy boundaries, be there for them consistently, and point them to God. Period. This was so freeing to me.
I am not sure what my role will be other than to take this information back to the ladies at the church and to train them to do this outreach and to mentor hurting women. I also think that the info will be really valuable to Mary in her jail ministry. And maybe the two ministries can combine. I could see myself facilitating support groups for the women and debriefing the teams, maybe even providing consultation to the mentors. I will pray and wait and see.

USC

Went to see Joel in LA last weekend and blogged in my journal--will copy it here:
This is such a unique place. The busy-ness reminds me of New York--constant traffic, tons of people always moving but more bikes and pedestrians and skateboards. The grocery store reminded me of Mexico City--about as many hispanic folks and spanish being spoken and limited selection and dirty floors. The prices were low, too, expecially the produce which makes sense. The people here are unique--all fashion forward--not dressy, just edgy, cooler. The weather is amazing--right about skin temp--a little warmer in the afternoon and a little cooler in the evening. No more that a light breeze ever and often its perfectly still. There are palm trees and stucco buildings and flowers and food trucks and lots of sunshine (and smog this morning).
Visit so far: Getting to the airport, parking and flight were perfect--I even had a great nap on the plane with no one sitting next to me. Joel met me on the corner where the shuttle dropped me off and we walked to his apartment. It's above the pool and is very quiet, simple, serene. His rommates are calm and quiet and nice. Right when I arrived, the USC housing people came around with an adorable beagle dog who was sniffing for bed bugs. Interesting. We relaxed then walked about half an hour and had a nice breakfast at Jacks and Jo. We stopped by one of Joel's class buildings on the way back then rested at the apartment. He went to class and I napped then we walked to the grocery store. The lady in front of my had two credit cards decline so I paid for her groceries--about $50. Ours turned out to be about half as much as I'd estimated so that was cool. We got back to Joel's apartment and went to Joel's friend Alicia's apartment so they could inteview each other for a frat assignment. I tagged along. He's very busy. He's at class now so I'm people watching.

God is so good

I have just been through one of the most difficult weeks of my life. Every single time I have been through something rough, I am blown away but how good God is and how He provides all we need and more always, but even more during trials. There were so many blessings this week. I want to share them with you but also preserve them here. So most of you know that on Monday last week, I got a call at work from my brother that Jean took an overdose of pills and was being rushed to Shawnee Mission Hospital. I left work and got there in time for her to sort of wake up. I came home that night and went to work the next day to get things organized to go back and was surrounded with love and support from my work friends. All week I received texts and calls and emails from all my friends and family and I felt their love and prayers. I spent all week in KC drawing closer to Jean, who apparently needed us so much more than she let on, and had some really awesome times with my dad this week and also my brother. Jean was able to really hug me close and to share her heart with me. We prayed together and cried together many times this week. One special memory is several times as we were leaving the floor, I asked if we could pray and the three of us, Dad, Jean and I would come close with our arms around each other and foreheads touching, praying and crying together. Dad shared his heart with me quite a bit this week also as he wrestled with what happened with Jean but also trying to come to terms with his Alzheimers. I now understand that someone as intelligent and as social as my Dad can fool people into thinking they aren't as progressed with the disease as they are. The social worker told us that lots of people would spend a few minutes with Dad and say he seems fine (for example, Scott spent about 15 minutes with him and said we are overreacting). The more time we spent with Dad, the more impaired we realize he truly is and the more care he needs. It gives me insight into what Jeanie has been going through. Sure, my Dad seems fine. In fact, he is much mellower and easier to get along with than ever. But he wanders in the night and other times. He forgets and even gets into his meds at the wrong times. But he is funny and I really enjoyed my week with him. Night before last we put steaks on the grill and sipped mai tais on the patio and we both really enjoyed ourselves. Dad asked me, "Does Scott do crazy things like this with you?" Each morning we sat together at the breakfast bar in the kitchen eating our cereal and sipping coffee. Yesterday he offered me a year's salary to come live with them. We went for a long walk on a cool trail in the woods and chatted the whole time. We laughed and joked together. On one walk, I told him he gets around pretty well for an old guy and he said, "I'm slowing waaaay down for you." Another awesome blessing was a social worker from the Alzheimer's Association that I just ended up on the phone with (coincidence? I don't think so). She had sooo much knowledge and compassion. She spent two hours on Sunday of Labor Day weekend with us as she recognized the crisis. I learned so much about resources and Alzheimers and she really helped Dave and I come together on some decisions and make a plan. I was able to switch from flailing around to a planned attack. I was able to come home to get ready to head into a tough work week (but I know that God will be with me). My brother is so amazing to take on so much since he lives closer to both Dad and Mom. Really, truly, this has been an incredibly tough week but I feel closer to Dad, to Jean, to my brother, and I feel so much closer to God. No matter how close I get to Him and how endless His wisdom, mercy and provisions seem, there is no end to Him, there is just infinitely more that He has for me. It is so amazing to hit a huge crisis like this and just feel His arms around me and I just lean back into Him and watch Him work out all the details in miraculous ways I could never dream of. We will probably place Dad and Jean in one of the super nice retirement villages there in KC where they will get all they need and we can go see them without worrying about them. A few more details to work out and this will all be ok.

Update

I am feeling guilty because I have completely neglected my family the last few weeks. I want to call and have a great conversation with each of you, then I thought I could email you, then I thought well, I can at least blog you and you'll know what is going on with us and then I can somehow let each one of you know I love you and miss you, I think of you often, and I have each one of you in my prayers! I even missed Julie's birthday this week! I haven't even kept up with you on facebook!

School has started and is full swing. Along with the usual many many things to get started, I am already doing full social work crisis intervention and have already had a staff conflict (which I HATE and avoid at all costs and then have to work really hard to let go of and not beat myself up!) It is hard to get back into getting up in the mornings and balancing my time throughout the week. This year we have a few additional things going on at home too, as you know!

Renovation update: The big room upstairs has been sheetrocked and painted and Jon moved his stuff over there and loves it! It is a great room! We still need to put in the new light fixture. The smaller room has the new antique twin bed set up for guests but will be somewhat of a storeroom also until the whole project is done. The upstairs bathroom is done all except for hanging the cabinet above the toilet. It is beautiful! I will put pictures on facebook as soon as we get it totally done. But I have moved my stuff up there and am sharing it with Jon. I got to soak in the tub after a workout this week! It really is very nice. Yesterday I started demolition on the bathroom downstairs.:)I picked out all the cabinets and countertops for the bathroom and kitchen and yesterday ordered the kitchen appliances!

We enjoy having Jon here but I think I see him about 5 minutes a day if that. He is so busy with his ministry but it is going well. He's made tons of friends and sometimes they pop in with him, too. I think Scott sees him during the day more than I do.

I am still spending time with Adelle each week. We tie dyed t shirts last weekend and sometimes I give her a ride to her youth group. Today we will just look at the shirts, get some orange leaf frozen yogurt, check her facebook and I'm anxious to hear about her first week at the big high school. She turns 16 in November! I had her stuck in my mind at 14!

I did a great job with working out this week and plan to add some variety to things. I did my fitball and step classes on Monday, circuit class on Tuesday, then Wednesday I went over to the new East side gym and did a step class then tried spinning! I made it about 20 minutes because it hurt my bum but I want to do it again! Thursday night I ran anneberg trail (1.7 miles) at a pretty fast pace and only walked a few steps twice! On Friday I did the step plus class. I took one of Scott's soccer players with me (she did the elliptical).

Scott's (well, its my ministry too I suppose) MCC soccer is in full swing. They had the alumni game Thursday then Friday I took Kimber to the gym and then Friday night Scott and I went to the all school pep rally. Saturday night about 10 girls came over and hung out and I fed them a home cooked meal--roast with fixins and blueberry slump. They watched a movie and then we played a couple rounds of dominoes. I enjoyed it very much. Their first game is Tuesday. They (and Scott) can really use some prayers because they are short on players anyway and several key players are injured. Scott has really struggled the last few weeks as it seems like one challenge after another with things not going well.

Joel has settled in again at USC and likes his apartment and class schedule and apartment living. I get to go see him in September because there is a conference there my church is sending me to (on how to do outreach to girls in the strip clubs!) Joel granted me permission to stay in his apartment.

I went to Newton to see Leah on Sunday and she is moved back into a new mod on campus and likes her classes, etc. I haven't talked much to Hannah at all so I need to but she is doing well also and has started classes, too!

I love each of you and miss you! Today I am heading to church then a quick lunch then get Adelle from 1-3 then meeting with the contractor then Bible study here from 6:30-8:30. See? This is what life is like lately. But it is all good, very good!

Endings and Beginnings

My head is whirling with all the endings and beginnings to adjust to in my life lately. I seem to be a person who takes longer to process changes so all these at once is a lot to process. Lots of emotions. Summer is ending. Water jog ended today without being able to actually have the last class due to rumbling thunder in the distance. That was weird. My beautiful tan will now fade. Today was cooler and it reminded me that we can get outside more often and soon it will be fall. School is starting. I push those thoughts out of my mind whenever they pop up. I'm not ready yet this year. Usually I am ready to go back by now. When school does start, I will have sooo much to jump into. I started to list them but that made me think about it too much so I backspaced it. Not ready. Jon is moving in--tomorrow. It will be a new experience having him live here. I am excited to see what God does through him here. Joel is leaving and this marks the end of my kids living at home. I feel sad about that but also ready. He's ready, too. Scott starts his MCC season on Monday. This is really the start of a ministry for both of us. We plan to have all the girls over every Saturday night for dinner and games. I'm excited! And probably the biggest beginning of all--the house remodel! It is overwhelming and exciting and did I mention overwhelming? For a person who takes awhile to process changes, this is major. I have to get used to having people in the house. I have to make tons of decisions pretty much daily. I am trying to simplify and get rid of stuff. It will be a challenge to get used to each room being torn up and we've barely scratched the surface of that! I just keep looking forward to how great it will be when its done. And just below the surface of all these beginnings and endings is the thoughts and emotions of an ending that puts all the rest of these into perspective--the end of Kevin's life. I think about him,and about Shari and the kids multiple times a day. Really, it makes all the changes I'm dealing with seem so trivial. I am so thankful that I have God to turn all my concerns over to. Nothing is too big or too small for Him--He cares about all of it. He takes away my sadness, my fears, my stress, and helps me see things differently so that I can cope. I love you, Lord Jesus.

Summer Summary

This summer has been a roller coaster ride and as usual, seems over way too soon. It started with a high--all the kids and Rob home for a week. The trip to see Leah stands out as a high. Hanging out with Adelle was in itself a roller coaster ride but had some great moments--like hanging out with her friends at the fair and her getting invited to youth group. Teaching water jog was also a roller coaster but I enjoyed it. My favorite class at the gym turned out to be circuit--it seemed I was busy to make it to step or fit ball too often. The trip to Omaha was relaxing and fun. And then the bottom of the roller coaster, losing Kevin. Words can't even describe how hard this was. I don't really need to explain because all of my readers (you, my family) were affected too. It was good to have Hannah home even if it was for this sad occasion. Having Joel home had its ups and downs too. It turns out I was adjusted to having a quiet, non messy house. I have enjoyed spending time with him but the mess and noise (double due to Zeb being glued to Joel) was not always fun. I'm sure I will miss all of it as soon as he goes back to school. I am looking forward to having Jon here. And then the remodel. So interesting. I am discovering that this is not at all like the shows on TV. There is a social protocol for having a house full of plumbers and contractors. You just go along with your life and sort of pretend they aren't here and they go along with thier work and pretend you aren't here. The first day I greeting them in my pj's with my hair sticking up but I am now get up and take my shower before they arrive. Then I have my quiet (ha!) time with them traipsing in and out and up and down the stairs carrying huge pipes and equipment. Its scary and exciting and strange. I can tell it is going to be a total roller coaster, too. They decided that they have to replace the entire large pipe that goes from the basement to the top of the house and also found that the roof is still leaking. But it is all going to be great! It takes a long time, too. A week just to get Joel's room done--the corner sheetrock repaired, sanded, then painted. Oh, I was supposed to be summarizing the summer. I think it will be quite awhile until I can go throughout my days without feeling so sad about Kevin. I can finally concentrate again. I can't imagine what it must be like for Shari and the kids, or for Joyce. Today I got the letters for going back to school. There are always such surprises! Since Woodrow Wilson isn't done with the construction, apparently the 5th and 6th graders will be at Eisenhower! I have so many questions about how that will work! I am supposed to be working on the Hidden Curriculum that I will be teaching with Traci for the kids in the autism program. I have a general idea what to teach. I am soooo not ready for school to start. I am excited for Scott's MCC season to start. He just asked me if we can have a once a week game night with food over here. Yes! Just not Friday nights! Its going to be fun! Well, Scott and I are heading to the movie soon--a last late night out. Summer is almost over!

Beautiful

I've been really into two songs lately: Cloverton's Take Me Into the Beautiful and Gungors's Beautiful Things. So I have decided to do a Bible Study of the word beautiful and do it on my blog instead of in my prayer/Bible study notebook. I'll start with some of the lyrics of the two songs.

Take me into the mystery, gently lift me with Your grace
Make the chaos a chorus, with Yourself come fill this place
Cover me with Your mercy, come and cover me with love
Cover me so that all might see that it's You not me
It is You that I am singing of

Take me into the beautiful
Where the rivers flow
With a love that never ends
Oh I wanna go to the beautiful
lalalalalalala

Take me into the beautiful where the faces glow
With the lights that never dim
Oh I wanna go to the beautiful
Come on and take me again

A love that's brighter than diamonds when I'm with You
A love that always invites us to be with You
Your love is brighter than diamonds now that I'm with You

Take me into the beautiful
Where the rivers flow
With a love that never ends
Oh I wanna go to the beautiful
lalalalalalala

All this pain
I wonder if I'll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

(Chorus)
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust
You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of us

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You

In Matthew 3:2, Jesus healed the man crippled from birth at the gate called Beautiful.

Song of Solomon 7:1 How beautiful your sandaled feet, O prince's daughter...

Romans 10:15... As it is written, "How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" ...

Song of Solomon 4:1 How beautiful you are, my darling! Oh, how beautiful! Your eyes behind your veil are doves. ... You are beautiful, my darling, beautiful beyond words. ...

Matthew 23:27 "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you ...
... You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the
inside are full of dead men's bones and everything unclean. ...

Genesis 29:17 Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel was lovely in form ...
Leah had weak eyes, but Rachel was lovely in form, and beautiful. ... There was no sparkle in Leah's eyes, but Rachel had a beautiful figure and a lovely face. ...

Psalm 48:2 Great is Jehovah, and greatly to be praised, In the city of our God, in his holy mountain. 2 Beautiful in elevation, the joy of the whole earth, Is mount Zion, [on] the sides of the north, The city of the great King.

Ecc 3:11 He has made everything beautiful in its time.

Isaiah 4:2 In that day the Branch of the LORD will be beautiful and glorious, and the fruit of the land will be the pride and glory of the survivors in Israel. ..

Did it!

I did it! I demolished the upstairs bathroom getting it ready to remodel. On Tuesday afternoon, I took off the shower surround and uncovered black mold. Tons of it! a It freaked me out and I wasn't masked so I sealed up the room and called it good. On Wednesday, I put on a mask, opened the window and removed as much of the yucky wallboard as I could until I had a headache. Last night I employed the Tom Sawyer method with Joel. He spent about 15 minutes and matched my two hours of labor easily. He loved it! "This is easy mom!." So with little cajoling and offer to pay him, he helped for about 1 1/2 hours today and we finished! Joel mostly pulled off the sheetrock and I scrubbed black mold, removed nails and toted the sheetrock out to the driveway. I also did the research on how to remove the toilet. And voila! Its done! I'll bet I burned some serious calories.

Letters from Adelle

The last two times I've picked up Adelle, she's written me a letter which she reads to me as soon as she gets in the car. Even though she has been pushing my limits lately, these letters are pretty cute.
This one was written on lined index cards:
Dear Ms. Clark: Nicki Minaj lost no. 1 in the eight-at-eight yesterday the same day Tim Cowlinshaw and Woody Paige were stopped cold. I like when I can do my twelve hobbies. If I do dance camp, I'm on the dance team. Sports--I'm out vellyball, basketball, and track this year. I can do volleyball and basketball at the DCC gym. The tennis clinic and Stagg Hill Golf club give me more to offer. I can do it all at once next summer--long as I add weight training to mix for a tug of war. Back to sports--If I'm into soccer and softball, that's fine next summer. According to some people, I can get lockers unstuck. Darby Price update--She wants to know if I can form a fan club and do girls club, which is nice. I helped her when she was hurt, and I wonder if she'll invite me over. Jackie Mac update--she hasn't won since June 29--a span of just one loss. She wins today, the Cowlinshaw and Paige woul do the same, and Nicki Minaj will get No. 1 back. I want a high GPA. The fair offers me a chance at the Idol and Fair Factor, and I have a good team. School activities--I had fun in Thespians, FCA, and Stuco, and will do the same in the variety show, Battle of the Bands, Art Club, Spanish Club, and I had fun in choir. Imagine doing volunteer work, right? Mentor news--can I work for it? I want to see if Darby can read my publications. See you in a bit, Adelle.
This one was written on the back of a peice of notebook paper--I couldn't read the other side. Dear Ms. Clark: Woody Paige won Friday, defeating JA Adande 2-0. Adande led 1-0, but lost his point in the final showdown. Both, along with Bonami Jones, scored 20, but Jackie Mac was limited to 19 and was out after Buy or Sell, so she would go on to never make a showdown this past week. I was watching TV at 4:00 Sunday. You know Around the Horn isn't on air on weekends. Something caught my eye, and there was...Nicki Minaj. A female rapper. I couldn't help but watch it all. When it was over, I thought, "This I could tell you about when we get together in a few days. Surely, I'd tell all my friends on Facebook and the E! Special. Here's what I'll upload for my friends: a video of Nicki Minaj performing "Super Bass." See you in a few days, Adelle. P.S. Can we see a movie or go swimming?

Cure for Melancholy

1. Ask God to search my heart for any unconfessed sin keeping us separate.
2. Cling to His words: example: Why are you crushed down, o my soul? And why are you troubled in me? Put your hope in God, for I will again give him praise who is my help an my God.
3. Resist the devil.
4. Make a list of all God has done for you--His blessings.
5. Do something for someone else.
6. Search you heart for any unforgiveness, confess, ask God to help you forgive.
7. Worship.
8. Cling to Phil 4:12-13
9. Psalm 17:15 As for me, I will continue beholding your face in righteousness (right standing) I shall be fully satisfied, when I awake, beholding Your form (having sweet communion with You.)
10. Confess your discontentment because it shows ingratitude and a lack of trust.

Lately

I've been fighting melancholy lately...or is it lonliness or do I just miss Scott? I can't predict when it is going to hit...Joel might be home when it happens and he might not. It usually occurs when I don't have anything planned or when plans don't work out. It always happens when I make big plans to go somewhere then decide not to, like Saturday when I planned to drive to Towanda for the funeral then to see Leah then home. I decided it was just too much driving since Leah worked til 6, so I didn't go. I felt good about the decision but then I'd done all my errands and by 1 I was bored and lonely and just, well, melancholy. I haven't felt that way since. Again it goes back to living a purposeful life. Every day I seek to be a blessing to someone else but it is so easy in the summer to fall back into self-focussed living. I go get Adelle but she is pushing limits, taking our time together for granted, and I end up feeling used. I know it isn't about me, but she only wants to eat my food and get on my computer. I can't seem to find things she really wants to do other than that and even then she pushes limits. I do plan to get her today and try to keep her busy. I offered to take her to the movie but she doesn't want to go. So we'll go to the grocery store and the library and come over here so she can snack and look at her facebook. I am looking forward to teaching deep water aerobics today (a little nervous but oh well). The bank appraiser is coming so I can start demo on the bathroom too! I am so anxious for this remodel to get started and I don't know what the hold up is! No melancholy today.

Remodeling!

Its really going to happen! Finally! It doesn't feel real quite yet but we've met with the contractor, the bank appraiser is coming on Monday, and today I went to the custom wood cabinet shop and "picked out" vanity/closet cabinets and kitchen cabinets and counters. Tomorrow I look at tiles for the bathrooms and then I'm supposed to start thinking about harware, lighting and shopping for appliances. Its crazy overwhelming! Today I spent time organizing the bedroom upstairs for Joel to move into temporarily and then as soon as the bank appraiser goes through, I can start demolition upstairs! Here is the total plan:
Fix the rotten bay window in front.
Replace the front door insert, repair the front steps, and build a small portico over the front door.
Repair the sheetrock in Joel's room.
Completely gut and remodel the upstairs bathroom (except for the tub).
Remove the closets in the master bedrooms and replace the floors where the closets were. Repair the ceiling and walls of in there and replace the ceiling fan and light. Gut the bathroom and remove the wall between the bathroom and small bedroom. Add a double vanity, tile three quarters of the room including a walk in shower surrounded by glass and a free standing tub, and build a large closet with shelves and dressers, etc.
Gut the kitchen and replace everything! Remove the built in cabinet opening up the space and add a kitchen island. Remove the back door.
Either replace the patio and extend it and add a roof over it OR remove the walls and enlarge the whole room.
Refinish all the floors and replace all the lighting.
Yahoo! I can't wait to get started but I'm overwhelmed and a tad freaked out about the details--where will we put all the stuff from the rooms we are working on? How will we live? Will we pick all the right things? EEK!

Water Jog

Teaching water jog continues to be fun but challenging. I have to keep inventing and changing it up to keep people interested. We've done an interval class where we do a strength move like lunges then spike our heartrates with our arms or sprints or jacks in the middle, then we alternate with strength moves again. We've done a favorites day where each lap I call on someone to name what we do next. Friday we will get out the tubes and encorporate them into class. Tomorrow I cover Ashley's class right after mine. Its going to be HOT out there! Next week I fill in for her one day at deep water. Should be fun! I have had some complainers and some know-it-alls but I get compliments too. The positive comments outweigh the negative. I guess the class is harder than I expected overall but I don't have to pay and am making money (in theory--my first check didn't cover the water shoes and swimsuit I bought!:) I love keeping in shape and water class does it! I also really like helping other people get in shape, too!

Lots more leisure

Since I was getting bored, I decided to embrace the nothingness. Why fight it? My quiet time yesterday actually said that Satan can twist anything out to be negative not by changing your circumstances, but your attitude toward them, turning it to negative.
I got up in time for breakfast. I had oatmeal with brown sugar and raisins, OJ, and coffee with milk and splenda and sat at a table with a white tablecloth in a courtyard outside. I got my Bible study stuff and my computer and my book and decided not to go try to find someplace, I just sat at the chairs and tables outside the hotel. It was quiet and there was a nice breeze and pretty flowers. I could even hear birds chirping amongst the high rise buildings. I also like people watching.
Just before lunchtime, I walked to Old Market and just browsed some of the interesting shops we'd missed-- a merantile, an outdoor decoration and fountain store, the Christian bookstore. Then I stopped by Patrick's Market and bought a turkey, cheese and fresh spinach sandwich, kettle chips, and a vitamin drink. I bought Scott a toothbrush and ibuprofen and a ginger ale for later. I went back to the chairs and read for a long while, then went to the room. I layed in the dark, cool room on down pillows all afternoon and read and napped.
Scott got back at 5:30 and I put on another of my new shirts with my new white jeans. We joined his classmates at the Spaghetti works. They were interesting people--all from different places with a variety of backgrounds. The whole group walked to a nearby bar but Scott and I got sidetracked on the way by gospel singers. We listened to them for quite a while and enjoyed them throughly. They had amazing, strong, loud, confident voices that blended together really well.
The bar had irish music and I felt somewhat awkward because I couldn't hear anyone to be able to have a conversation. We did meet some interesting classmates on the sidewalk outside, one who works in the foster care system in Oregon and they have an 84% success placement rate!
Today is catch up and pack up day. I do hope to catch up with Marie Larson today if possible. She is recovering from surgery so I have waited to call her.

Woman of Leisure.....

This leisure thing gets old after awhile, but I am still having fun.

Scott got back to the room yesterday at 5:30 and had some emails to send, etc. so I got ready to go out. I wore my jeans and black lace tankini with the new butterfly shirt over the top. I looked great!:) We drove back to the mall and found PF Changs. I had never eaten there and it was a true treat. The atmosphere is plush. We started with fried green beans for an appetizer. Yummy! We only ate about a third before they brought our egg drop soup. Then I had mongolian beef. It was fantastic! I ate the whole thing and every drop of the brown rice. Forget the chopsticks. I was stuffed. I had forgetten that they included dessert in our meal for two so we chose the wall of china chocolate cake. It was half of an entire cake! So good! We walked around for awhile (Dick's Sporting Goods--I wanted one of everything in there) and then went to the movie to see Bridesmaids. Of course we had to get popcorn AND a coke icee. I felt like a giant bloated monster by the time we were done. I may never eat again. Got to bed late.

Today I got up at 9:15. I ordered a small carafe of coffee from room service totally forgetting I have some in the room I can make. What? Make it myself? I am a woman of leisure! But I did need some cream. If this room had a tiny fridge it would be perfect. I ate my breakfast granola and leftover juice from yesterday. Then I set out walking again. I stopped nearby the hotel at an upper end bathroom remodeling shop and got some ideas for the remodel. Then I walked about 10 blocks to Creighton University. I found the main walkway and went to a building that looked like it might have the bookstore. The campus was ok, not as pretty as K-State because the buildings are all different from each other and the walkway is boring and straight. A part of it did have some nice gardens and a fountain. USC is nicer too as is Bethel. The student center did not have the bookstore so I asked directions at an info desk then tried to follow them. He said go straight so I did but there were buildings in the way so I went around them. A long way. I asked two students and found out the building was back where I had orginally started! So I found the bookstore (about the size of Bethel's) and got stickers for our cars. Then I walked back to the Hotel. I walked a total of about an hour and half minus the 15 minutes I spend in the bathroom store.
Back at the hotel I grabbed my work out stuff and water and headed down to the fitness center. I did the stairstepper for 10 minutes then did some sit ups and an upper body workout for about half an hour.
Back at the room, I showered and drank a diet ginger ale from home and ate pretzel chips and cheese. Not much. Then I put on a dress and walked down to the Old Market in search of a coffee shop. I wasn't in the mood to blog or read or facebook so I shopped in a boutique and almost bought two shirts but decided I have spent waay to much money and didn't get them. I listened to some really good sidewalk musicians (guitar, singer, and cellist) and then came back to the hotel. I read and slept in bed wearing Scott's Creighton shirt all afternoon.
Scott got back from class and we set out for Old Market again. Scott is exhausted and was texting to catch up on stuff from home and wasn't terrific company but he tried. We did some window shopping in some very interesting shops including a novelty shop where we both bought journals. Cool. Then we found a restaurant where we could sit outide. I ordered fish and chips. Good and not too filling. We listened to another sidewalk musician and then came back to the hotel. They were serving cookies and milk in the lobby so we had to partake.
Two more days!

Woman of Leisure Day Two

Slept in til 8:45 this morning. Scott left for his class before 8. I drank my frappacino and put on my walking clothes and set out. I found a fantastic walking trail (will try to put up the picture) amongst the tall downtown buildings and a man made creek. It eventually led to a river walk and around a fancy pond. On a bridge above me, it said Welcome to Iowa so I literally walked to Iowa and back! I listened to Casting Crowns and worshipped as I walked. 70 degrees. I only saw a few people, some were homeless. Homeless people are surprised to be smiled at and greeted. I also checked out the flooding down by the river that they are madly pumping out.
I stopped by Patrick's market again on the way back to the Hotel and bought granola cereal and more Odelle juice and some muscle milk. When I got to the room, I ordered coffee from room service and a bowl and spoon and then ate right on the bed again. (I forgot to mention that Scott and I split a hotel burger and fries in the room yesterday for lunch). I showered and retrieved the car from valet parking (tips are going to add up quickly but I have a new valet buddy). I followed the directions from the checker at Patricks and found the mall all by myself! I went to Old Navy and bought nothing then went to American Eagle Outfitters in search of white jeans. They did not have my size but the next size up worked. They had a ton of summer shirts on sale so I bought three! I also got Scott an orange polo. We'll see if he wears it! Then I saw a Forever 21 and thought, I'm done shopping but Leah loves that store so I will check it out. Well, I couldn't believe it! I was immediately overwhelmed because I loved absolutely everything I saw! They have such colorful prints and tons of choices and they hang them by outfit. I would have bought and worn every single thing in the store! And the prices were so low! I was alternately drooling and fighting back tears--I'm not kidding! This was the garden of eden of clothing stores! I picked out a colorful skirt with black waistband and snaps (too small), a tube dress of flowy, colorful rayon (fits perfect), a thin, gauzy back print butterfly shirt that also fit perfectly, and a flowery summer sweetheart neckline strappy dress with a flowy skirt (fit well). I bought all three peices and only spent $60!
I then found a nail store with mani/pedi on special (cheaper than Walmart back home) and got the full treatment--chair massage, spa treatment, and beautiful nails--a plumy pink or pinkish plum color.
I went back to my favorite market and got a deli grilled ham and cheese, some fruit, and a fancy berry lemonade. I pulled up and dropped the car with my valet buddy and got out with all my mall purchases feeling like a wealthy woman. I tried to take a nap but I was too excited to blog all this so I changed into one of my new tops and walked back down to Old Market. I am sitting in a coffeeshop blogging at this very moment! Stay tuned for the rest of today and Woman of Leisure Day three tomorrow.

Woman of Leisure Day One

Got up Tuesday morning and got showered and finished packing then watched Joyce Meyer as I always do. (I am behind so watch them taped). Today it was about enjoying life and not feeling guilty for not always doing something Spiritual or productive...based on John 10:10. How fitting as I leave for vacation to Omaha with Scott! Scott has a week long class and a hotel and asked me to tag along!
We pulled out of town at 8:45ish and the ride was fairly uneventful. We had a good talk but I also like our quiet time together. We listened to a new Christian group from Scott's ipod--I think it is New World Sun or something like that? I liked it.

We pulled into Omaha about 12:30. We are staying at the Magnolia Hotel in downtown Omaha--an older, elegant Hotel. We have to valet park! So we unpacked in room 435 and settled in. Scott changed and took off for Ceighton about a mile away in the hotel shuttle. I walked about 3 blocks to the Old Market area just to check it out. It is an area a bit larger than aggieville and maybe one slight step up from Aggieville comparable, I guess to Westport in KC. It has tons of restaurants and specialty shops and coffeeshops. I went into a Goodwill store and checked the pricetag of a purse--$28! In the goodwill store! This lets me know I probably won't be shopping here. I went into a retro thrift store and a boutique. I'm not really a boutique person, more of a mall person, actually, I prefer Target if you really want to know! It was hot and sticky and I was tired. I had on my standard summer uniform--gym shorts and a tshirt and I felt out of place so I went back to the hotel. I stopped at a tiny market and bought bottled frappacino, pretzel chips, odella fruit juice and fancy cheese. I love little downtown markets--Leah and I discovered them when we were in New York. They are sort of a cross between a health food store, deli and grocery.
Back in the hotel room, I put on a comfy nightgown, itunes, pulled the curtains shut, crawled under the down comforter, laid back on the down pillows, and napped and read all afternoon. It stormed out and I could hear the rain hitting the window. Lovely! Scott's class went until 7 so I estimate I read and napped 5 straight hours! I even snacked in bed!
Scott came back and we changed (I dressed up this time--new black polka dot skirt and black shirt and heels). We walked back down to Old Market and ate at Spaghetti Works. It wasn't the best meal I've eaten but we sat outside and that was very nice. We walked around awhile--I had to ditch my heels and walk barefoot then went back to the Hotel. We watch Rondo on demand and took turns falling asleep. It finally ended around midnight!

Wisdom

Living a life of leisure is good, but I'm So much happier living a life of Purpose.

joplin edited version

I want to blog about this while it’s still fresh in my mind and also to help me process it. I just returned last night about 9:30 from a short term work team to tornado ravaged Joplin, Missouri. Two years ago I helped pick up debris after a tornado demolished a neighborhood here in Manhattan. I then spent two days in Chapman, Kansas that had been almost completely destroyed from the same tornado and also went with a small group from my church to clean up after the flooding in Iowa. All of those experiences had been rewarding, a chance to join with God in his work and service toward others. Although I did do physical labor, God used my counseling skills of listening and compassion to minister to those in crisis after disaster. I knew our church had taken a team to Joplin a few weeks ago but I’d been unable to go. On Sunday, when James spoke during the service about a Principal who had needed to talk after losing two of her students, I felt the little tug on my heart that God so often uses. I went up to James right after the service and said I’d go. I was a little concerned with how my sore, weakish back would do, but I knew God would use me somehow.

Thursday morning I packed up the usual things--long jeans and old shoes and shirt for work, clothes for the evening, something to sleep on and under, toiletries, and not much else. No make up or put together outfits needed. I knew to include ibuprofen, ibuprofen pm, ice pack, ear plugs, my journal and Bible, and trail mix. I’d taken off my finger nail polish, rings, and fancier earrings in anticipation.

During my Thursday morning quiet time, Joyce Meyer preached about attacks by Satan and how he attempts to steal our joy by attacking bodies, possessions, and minds. I Peter 4:12 ”Beloved, do not be amazed and bewildered at the fiery ordeal which is taking place to test your quality as though something strange were befalling you.” 2 Cor 4:8-9 “We are hedged in (pressed)on every side (troubled, oppressed in every way), but not cramped or crushed; we suffer embarrassments and are perplexed and unable to find a way out, but not driven to despair; we are pursued (persecuted and hard driven), but not deserted (to stand alone); we are struck down to the ground, but never struck out and destroyed. She said, don’t quit or give up! Keep moving forward! You will be known by your fruit. Suffering occurs when we go through something instead of avoiding it. We build muscle by enduring and bearing up to Satan’s attacks through mental and emotional pain, being hurt, heart broken, ill, rejected, facing criticism, loss. Suffering occurs when we stay where we don’t want to be for the sake of another. Satan wants us to quit, to doubt. We will suffer in this life. God tests our faith. Thursday morning I prayed for other missionaries and wrote in my prayer journal: “Good morning, Lord, and a beautiful morning it is! I’m ready for Joplin, Lord! Let us be a blessing there! Let our team have health, success at whatever you assign, good fellowship, and blessings!”


We met at the church Thursday at noon. I sort of knew James and knew he had a lot of experience leading teams with his work in World Hope. I saw Joyce Nelson’s name on the list and knew her well from a previous work mission to South Dakota and summer Bible study groups. I saw Erin Anderson on the list and was surprised as I hadn’t known she attends Westview. Erin and I had kids who’d attended public school together but I didn’t know her well. When we got to the church, Dick Nelson was there and not Joyce as her father had taken ill suddenly. Up walked Greg Mc Henry who I’d known for years raising kids the same age in church. His wife, Tawny, had been in our summer Bible study also. Mike Smith came along--I knew him from a trip to Guatamala 8 years ago and we also sit in the church balcony near his beautiful family. Another young man, Stan, I didn’t know at all and Sue Thieman, a gal a few years older than me, I barely knew. We all prayed with Deb Klutz on the front patio and waited for Richard Bryant. Turns out Richard had been in a fender bender about an hour previously so he wasn’t going to be able to drive. I had known Richard’s family for years also having kids similar ages in the church, but I didn’t know him well. As soon as he arrived, we all piled our things in the work trailer and divided up into Sue’s car and James’ truck for the 5 hour trip to Joplin. Stan, Erin and Mike rode in Sue’s SUV. Greg, Richard, Dick James and I rode in James’ 4 x 4 pick up truck, me in the back between Richard and Dick.

The ride went quickly as Richard and James were both good conversationalists. Its interesting how uncomfortable and awkward you can feel at the beginning of a three day trip (being worried my leg was touching one of theirs) compared to the end of the trip when I felt completely like one of the guys, comfortable, even close (getting teased, holding hands to pray, reaching out for an encouraging hug, sharing thoughts and feelings)….

We drove into Joplin on a route that didn’t take us by any of the destruction. We pulled up to Royal Heights Methodist Church at about 5:30. There were several work trailers like ours and people milling about. The church was not what I expected, older, certainly not a wealthy church. There was a smallish traditional sanctuary and then a fellowship hall that was absolutely filled with donations of clothes and household items, sorted into categories. The other half of the hall had round tables and people beginning to gather for an evening meal. We sort of stood to the side with our belongings and felt like outsiders. James led us down the hall of a Sunday school wing and we put our things in a room where the guys would be sleeping. All the other rooms were taken up with sleeping bags and belongings. James spoke to us for awhile about what to expect and about the three or so other teams that were there. We went back into the fellowship hall and helped ourselves to a really good home cooked meal of roast, potatoes, corn on the cob, rolls and butter and dessert. After dinner, one of the leaders, Nate, kicked a small groups of guys out of a room for Erin, Sue and I to put our things. We put out our air mattresses, sleeping bags and sort of made ourselves at home in what must have been the music Pastor’s office. I grabbed a space by a plug for my cell phone and a chair to put stuff on.

We skipped devotions the first evening and went to look at the work site we’d be going to the next day. I was prepared for seeing the destruction having seen Manhattan, Chapman, and Iowa. The tornado hit a residential area first, about two blocks across, and continued 13.8 miles, taking out a hospital, a high school, middle school, elementary school, businesses, Walmart, Walgreens, Payless, a strip mall, and more residential. The trees had been stripped of all their leaves or were torn completely out. Houses in some areas were just piles of rubble, others were partially damaged, windowless, and all marked with the big x on the front put on by rescue workers to identify victims and suvivors. Most of the cars were upside down or smashed or windowless and dented. Few people other than volunteers were around. It was hard to imagine the people coming up from the basements after the storm and having to walk out. Could they have even known where to go or how far the devastation was? I imagine their first thoughts were of loved ones and how to get to them, how to let them know where they were. I imagined that rescue workers gave instructions. I had already heard stories of people who survived. Many people were injured and many died. I was impressed with the work that had already been done as much of what remained was piles of destroyed homes or homes with tarps on the roofs. Several businesses showed damage but were operating.

We got to first house we’d be working on just as the sun was setting. There was a couple there still working, running a skid loader and picking up debris by hand and putting it at the curb. The house had no roof, apparently a previous team had removed it. The home was owned by Nathan, who’d purchased it after the storm. His home had been one of the low income units owned by the church that was completely destroyed. Nathan had just gotten custody of his 4 children and needed a home so he bought his house with his small settlement and the church committed to helping him fix it up. We looked at the house but it was getting dark. We also drove by another house that part of our team would be roofing.

When we got back to the church, the Pastor was leading devotions. He preached on Isaiah 62, inserting Joplin for Jerusalem. “62Because of Zion I will not keep quiet, and because of Jerusalem I will take no rest, till her righteousness goes out like the shining of the sun, and her salvation like a burning light. 2 And the nations will see your righteousness, and all kings your glory: and you will have a new name, given by the mouth of the Lord. 3 And you will be a fair crown in the hand of the Lord, and a king's head-dress in the hand of your God. 4 You will not now be named, She who is given up; and your land will no longer be named, The waste land: but you will have the name, My pleasure is in her, and your land will be named, Married: for the Lord has pleasure in you, and your land will be married. 5 For as a young man takes a virgin for his wife, so will your maker be married to you: and as a husband has joy in his bride, so will the Lord your God be glad over you.
6 I have put watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem; they will not keep quiet day or night: you who are the Lord's recorders, take no rest, 7 And give him no rest, till he puts Jerusalem in her place to be praised in the earth. “
He also talked about John Wesley’s Covenant Prayer which was particularly meaningful.
I am no longer my own, but yours.
Put me to what you will, rank me with whom you will;
put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me be employed by you or laid aside by you,
enabled for you or brought low by you.
Let me be full, let me be empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things
to your pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God,
Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,
you are mine, and I am yours. So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth,
let it be ratified in heaven.
Amen.


After devotions, the Pastor split us into two groups for debriefing. He said he’d go with one group and asked James to assign someone to the other. James assigned me! I jumped right up willing but unsure. A group of about 10 came into the fellowship hall and we gathered around a table. Before I could get started, someone came in a said that part of their team was leaving and they wanted to say goodbye so they all left. Another group came in and we sat down. I suggested they just talk about their experiences and feelings. They had only worked half a day and so they talked some about their previous experiences.

Day Two
I slept ok considering. The room was cold and I slept on a camping pad with just a blanket over me. People were in the dining area talking and laughing until late. I was reluctant to put my ear plugs in so I could hear my alarm. I got up to use the restroom once and then slept til about 5:30 when I heard someone preparing breakfast in the kitchen. I got up and decided to wash my hair in the sink rather than trek out to the shower trailer. I put on mascara but it was racoon smeared by noon so I ditched that the rest of the time, along with the hair washing. I put on an old pair of jeans, tennis and old shirt that would be cool in the sun. I filled my water jug with ice and water and put on sunscreen and packed my backpack with my work gloves, cash, cell phone, snacks and more sunscreen.

Breakfast was coffee, OJ, and oatmeal with brown sugar and raisins. Yummy! At breakfast, I had a “divine appointment” with Arturo who sat down next to me. James had told us about Arturo on the trip down. Arturo was an undocumented illegal alien who’d been living in Joplin when the tornado hit. He needed to retell his story. Arturo had been outside and noticed a cloud that looked too close to the ground. Then debris started hitting his shoulder and back and he saw cars flying around! He ran to the house into the house. His family was in the small bathroom, in the bathtub and clinging to the toilet. Arturo laid over his brother who was holding his neice and nephew. When the storm had passed, the bathroom walls were bent in and there was nothing left of the house. Arturo climbed out and pulled his family out. As he walked down the street amongst the smashed houses, he could hear people screaming. He said he didn’t hesitate, he just started digging through the rubble and put people on his back and carried them to a field and laid them down, then ran back to get more. He said he pulled a woman out of an upside down car. He came across a boy who screaming for his mom so he pulled the mom out and the boy continued screaming and said his dog was still in the house, so Arturo went back into the house and got the dog. When he came out, the boy was smiling. Arturo said everyone was asking about an old lady and he couldn’t hear her screaming but he dug and dug and found her curled up, ok and just waiting, in the kitchen amongst smashed appliances. I asked Arturo how many people he thinks he helped that night and he said “30 or 40”. He said that police and rescue workers joined him and they worked into the night. Arturo had been working along the volunteer teams at the church the whole month since the tornado. He ate and showered there and prayed with the teams, also. I asked Arturo how he was doing, how he was sleeping. He said he dreamt every night of seeing the tornado and hearing the screams but he felt good since he was helping.

We worked hard today. I broke out plaster and lathe and shoveled and swept it into barrels to be dumped at the curb. We raked debris away from the house on the outside so the skid loader could get it. Several other teams joined us on an off throughout the day. I was hot and dirty but it was fun overall.

For lunch, we went to the park where people from New Orleans had come to “pay it forward” by feeding the volunteer teams in Joplin. We had huge pork chops, dirty rice, baked beans and bread. It was spicy and hot and I was hot even though there was a breeze in the shade so I had trouble eating it. Plus I’d been snacking all morning for energy. We sat near two young gentlemen who said they were plumbers from Joplin on their lunch break. One guy was pretty gregarious and he jumped right in when I asked if they’d had their homes destroyed and been home the night of the storm. He said they both lived outside the detruction. The one said he’d gone to the basement just after the sirens sounded and his power went off. After the storm, he’d gone out to his car to try to charge his cell phone and his girlfriend came running up covered in blood and screaming. She said she’d been in Payless when it was destroyed and had walked out and a stranger gave her a ride. She wasn’t terribly hurt but needed stitches so they went to the ER. The guy said the ER was packed and they hadn’t had time to put anything together and there were bleeding people and blood everywhere. There was a guy, he said, who had a bone sticking out of his arm and no one was helping him so he’d insisted and they finally took him back. He helped the others as best he could while they waited. The other guy was pretty quiet but when I asked if they’d lost family, he started talking. He said he’d just been at his friend’s house with the friend, the friend’s wife and two kids. They’d been on the first floor of a three story apartment complex that pancaked and they all died. The guy said he knew just driving by the complex. The guy went on to say that his uncle was a trained mountain ranger with cadaver dogs so he’d spent the whole next week helping recover bodies. I asked if he was ok and he said it was really hard having to write on the dead people’s foreheads. He said they were to find their ID and leave one form with the body, take the second form, and write something on themselves in case something happened to them. He said that they’d found quite a few body parts which were in the process of being identified. The total death toll in Joplin was 152, some of whom died later from their injuries or infection. Some are still missing.

In the afternoon, my back hurt, so I spent the afternoon sitting on the front porch pulling nails out of boards that they can reuse. I did a lot of listening, mostly to my team members who one by one came to talk to me. I listened to Richard who told me about 4 horrible incidents with his daughter while she was deployed to Iraq near people in her company who were killed. I listened to Stan talk about his failed marriage. I listened to a guy from another team talk about being unemployed and almost homeless. We finally cleaned up and left the work site about 5:30.

I immediately grabbed my towel, toiletries, and clean clothes and headed out to the shower trailer. One team had a ministry called “Poured out” that focused on providing water in various forms including a large trailer with 5 showers. The shower felt fantastic even though the small room was so sweltering that I had to towel off several times while getting dressed. Only a few of my team had returned to the church right away and they’d gone back to the park for more cajun food--gumbo. I ate fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, bread and butter and dessert from Culver’s provided to those of us at the church and it was delicious. I journal led while waiting for the rest of the team.

Devotions that evening were from Isaiah 2. 10 Go into a hole in the rock, covering yourselves with dust, in fear of the Lord, before the glory of his power. 11 The high looks of man will be put to shame, and the pride of men will be made low, and only the Lord will be lifted up in that day. 12 For the day of the Lord of armies is coming on all the pride of men, and on all who are high and lifted up; 13 And on all the high trees of Lebanon, and on all the strong trees of Bashan; 14 And on all the high mountains, and on all the hills which are lifted up; 15 And on every high tower, and on every strong wall; 16 And on all the ships of Tarshish, and on all the fair boats. 17 And the high looks of man will be put to shame, and the pride of men will be made low: and only the Lord will be lifted up in that day. 18 And the images will never be seen again. 19 And men will go into cracks of the rocks, and into holes of the earth, for fear of the Lord, and before the glory of his power, when he comes out of his place, shaking the earth with his strength. Pastor Traci talked about admitting we need help, even to God. Its me, its me, its me, O Lord, standing in the need of prayer. All I have needed, thou hath provided. Our circumstances don’t change, but the way we look at them does. When the Joplin people let us help them and we do a little, like clean up their yard, it unfreezes them so they can move on and carry out the rest. We all pretend we are fine, don’t need help, especially at church, pride keeps us from being real or getting to know our neighbor. Unconditional love means taking the time to really care how people are. When people need you, you come. Leaderships is authenticity, humility, repentance. We need to remove our masks and ask God to help us.

I went to bed at 8 and slept til 6--10 hours altogether! Devotions this morning were from Isaiah 42. 10 Make a new song to the Lord, and let his praise be sounded from the end of the earth; you who go down to the sea, and everything in it, the sea-lands and their people. 11 Let the waste land and its flocks be glad, the tent-circles of Kedar; let the people of the rock give a glad cry, from the top of the mountains let them make a sound of joy. 12 Let them give glory to the Lord, sounding his praise in the sea-lands.
13 The Lord will go out as a man of war, he will be moved to wrath like a fighting-man: his voice will be strong, he will give a loud cry; he will go against his attackers like a man of war. 14 I have long been quiet, I have kept myself in and done nothing: now I will make sounds of pain like a woman in childbirth, breathing hard and quickly. 15 I will make waste mountains and hills, drying up all their plants; and I will make rivers dry, and pools dry land. 16 And I will take the blind by a way of which they had no knowledge, guiding them by roads strange to them: I will make the dark places light before them, and the rough places level. These things will I do and will not give them up. Pastor always started with “This is the day the Lord has made” and we answered, “Let us be rejoice and be glad in it.” He said it is about giving God praise in everything. Whatever He intends you to do, do it for His glory. He said we have insurmountable tasks ahead, but there will be a little less to do at the end of the day. He said as we picked up the rubble and release it to the curb, we were to pick up our own issues, worries, concerns, and drop them also. Then we’ll be able to lift our hands more fully to God. We all gathered around Pastor Traci and prayed for him as he is retiring after Sunday--especially a hard time to let go. One of those who prayed said Traci had a heart “as big as Joplin”. So true.

The work today was more rebuilding, more removing of nails and old boards. I had several God moments. One was listening to K-Love and hearing the song, “Strong Enough” by Matthew West when I needed strength. Another was having Richard have the confidence in me to put my up on a ladder and remove the old boards at the very top. While up there, thinking about the text Scott sent saying he was proud of me, it occurred to me that my Dad would also have been proud of me for being up there and being in Joplin helping.

Richard patiently taught each of us the tasks he had for us to complete. Many of us had little or no construction experience. I even pounded some nails. I heard Stan say that his Dad hadn’t been a handy man and taught him some of the things that Richard was teaching. Stan and Mike and Richard repaired some rotten flooring and replaced two walls that were damaged. At one point, several large stones fell on Stan who was able to jump back quickly. One grazed his head and one scraped his arm. It could have been MUCH worse.

Lunch was at the high school served by another church group--hot dogs, gaterade, etc. I talked on the phone briefly to Hannah who said, “Its cool you are doing that.” I didn’t accomplish a whole lot in the afternoon. We did take a picture of our hands altogether and put it on face book--the hands of God in Joplin. My sunscreen started to irritate my face so when Sue showed up and offered to take me back to church, I went. We picked up her car that had needed service-- $680 and she dropped me back at the church. I rested and journalled and helped some in the kitchen. Dinner was wonderful--beef and noodles, green bean casserole and chocolate dessert. We debriefed with James. We talked about the 3000 who didn’t have insurance and how could they all be reached and helped. Also, the first timers talked about the closeness of the group and the spiritual high. We can keep the spiritual high going but the closeness of the group will fade when we get back to real life. Got to bed about 10:30.

Sunday morning, last morning, it was harder to get up. Part of getting ready to go work included bandaids on blisters and small cuts. The coffee was wonderful! The fellowship today felt even more special. I felt like one of the guys--lots of ribbing and teasing and affectionate comments. Today we finished up at the rock house. I cleaned out the yucky moldy basement. I discovered where the family had ridden out the storm in the basement. There were mountain dew and pepsi cans and candles. How scary! We all went over to the other house and the guys hurried to finish the roof as a lightening storm was coming.

I played with the neighbor’s puppy who was tied up in back. It looked like they needed to be away and left her there but it turned out they were sleeping in. I had yet another diving appointment with the neighbor. She came out and we started talking and she told me her storm story. She’d been fixing fried chicken and creamed peas and was listening to music. Her Dad called from St. Louis and suggested she turn on the TV. When she did, she saw the red radar and then the swirling red radar. She turned off the chicken and started preparing to go into the bathroom when the power went off and the sirens sounded. The got into bathtub, the 7 year old held the dog, mom held the boy, and the fiance got over the top of them with a mattress over him. When the storm was over, their roof had been lifted up and put back down and all their windows had blown out and people’s debris was strewn all over the house. They said they felt blessed. They checked on the neighbors and discovered a home completely blown up one and a half blocks away. The next block was the destroyed high school that had just been remodeled. She said that they were renting and the landlord was insured. They lived a week without power but decided to stay. Her son stayed with relatives for a few days but wet the bed there and came back. Amy said he continued to wake up scared and wet the bed and she didn’t know what to do. I suggested she have him write a story about the storm and illustrate it and be sure to include his feelings. She said he keeps saying, “this is horrible, mom.” I said to be sure to have him include that. I suggested she have him think of what he would have done with the tornado if he’d had special powers and include that in the book. I said to have him read the book to people every day. Amy said, “That is such a good idea, thank you, I didn’t know what to do!” and she hugged me. I prayed with her and gave her a verse on a card I’d brought. “Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am.” Phil 4:12.

Today we prayed in a circle holding hands several times.

Another very cool thing--I got to drive a bobcat! James patiently showed me how. I lifted up the bucket and drove it out of the lot and maneuvered it around three trucks, turned it, lined it up with the trailer ramps and shouted that I wasn’t driving it up onto the ramp. Richard and James waved me forward and I did it. I almost drove it off the other end of the trailer, but thankfully, I didn’t.

Stan had a cool moment, too. He is apparently afraid of heights and conquered that fear by going up on the ladder to pound nails at the very top of the house. Then he climbed right up on the roof of the other house! I took pictures so he’d always remember.

James and I talked and he said he’d talked to Brian about me leading more teams. I’m ready!

We went back to the church, showered, packed and prayed and left in the same cars we’d come down in. Sue’s car was not doing well so they went without air conditioning. They kept stopping on the side to cool it off but it was clear it wasn’t going to make it home. At one point, Sue came back to the truck and James, always the joker, only rolled his window down part way and said to very hot Sue, “I don’t want to let the air conditioning out!” We limped the car to Parsons and made calls. Joyce left Manhattan to come get them, Erin traded places with Richard, and we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant. We all said goodbye. I will miss all of this team--quiet Greg, easy going Dick, baby leader James (the youngest but possibly wisest of all of us), unique Erin(Erin is a woman of contradictions--hard worker, lipgloss, steal toed boots and pink visor), sweet Sue, patient Richard (“crash”), Stan the Bible man, and family man Mike. God used each one of us in unique ways to be a blessing to each other and to the people of Joplin.

Lord, I lift up Joplin to You and ask that You keep them in Your care and provision. Let them continue to heal emotionally and physically. Comfort those who have lost loved ones. Continue to repair, replace and rebuild. Let them experience Your perfect peace. Encourage them, Lord. Restore in them hope. In Jesus Name. Amen