My Eye

Now that I am over 50, it is a prerequisite that I talk about my health--ha ha.  Two weeks ago, I had an appointment to get a cyst taken off my eye at the Opthamologist.  In the meantime, I grew a giant sty under my eyelid.  Giant!  So the doctor asked me if he should go ahead and pop it.  And I, the dummy that I am, said yes.  So he took me into the surgery room and deadened my eye then put a thing on it to hold it open.  I had no way to close my eye so had to sort of watch the procedure very close up.  He didn't get it all, apparently, so I had to walk around with a swollen, purple eye for a week.  Also had to wear my glasses which just does not work for me.  I should have taken pictures for your viewing pleasure.  Then this week I had the cyst removed which left a lovely bloody spot in my eye.  The good news is, my eye feels wonderful! I just hope this spot doesn't stay.  Also, I about made the doctor cry because he asked how my eye had done from the sty removal and when I told him, he was a absolutely crestfallen.  He had to leave the room to compose himself.  I had to talk him into doing the cyst removal because he was worried I would be unhappy.  Very strange.

West Nile/Spinach Fiasco

I've told most of you this story but am blogging about it for posterity.

Scott was super sick on and off these last few weeks--very worrisome, took him to the ER.  They originally thought it was West Nile Virus or Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever.  We are pretty darn sure it was recalled Spinach.  I have never seen him this sick in our lives together and hope I never do again.  DONT EAT UNWASHED SPINACH!  It'll be awhile til we even buy spinach or put it in our smoothies.

Two weddings and a funeral

This has been a busy month, but a good month because it was family month.  On September 8, my nephew, Ryan, married the mother of his sweet baby, Samantha.  They married outdoors on the Griffith farm.  Leah and David came up so I got to spend time with the Griffiths, my mamacita, my Dad and Jean, and Leah.  The wedding was beautiful and the reception fun--good food and dancing.  The things that stick out in my memory are little Landon asleep in the wagon that the bridesmaids pulled up the aisle, and little Liam dancing to the beat of the music in his vest with his little baby muscles sticking out.  Also, Sam's dance with her step papa was heart warming and hilarious.

Last weekend, after going to Topeka to be near Larry in his last few hours on Tuesday night, then riding with Scott's team to Bethel for some more Leah time, we went to Topeka on Saturday morning for Larry's funeral--a celebration of his life.  More family time with Leah and David and Julie, etc. but not for a happy occasion.  This was followed with some good Julie phone conversations.  She is a testament to how important a personal relationship with Our Lord is as this is what is sustaining her.

Then yesterday, beautful Emily married.  It was a unique, touching, beautiful ceremony.  Shari and Emily and Hannah all looked amazing.  I can't believe I didn't get a picture of Emily except her boots.  The reception was good in that we spent a lot of time with family and the food was delish.  I enjoyed Season tremendously--we don't spend enough time with Season and Ian or all the Kuenzi's for that matter.  The things that stuck out in my memory of this wedding are the wonderful boots, the layout on the farm of the wedding itself, the hayrack ride for the bridal party, the music, and how hard I cried when Emily's brothers walked her down the aisle and gave her away in Kevin's place.  I cried the "ugly cry".  We miss you Kevin and you should have been there.  I know you were watching from heaven.

Now the girls are here--Leah for 4 days and Hannah for the week.  Next weekend I shall drive her back to Laramie.  Be sure to check out her trip photos on facebook.  Amazing.

surreality

     I don't even know if that is a word--but this weekend was surreal and I can't get a feeling of normal back.  Usually, normal things occur, day after day, with no new experiences.  Every now and then I do something different or something different occurs and then life goes back to being completely normal.  This weekend, there were 5 new events that occurred.
      Friday night I brought a kid home from work with me to give his foster family (teacher friend of mine) a break.  He is a very unusual young man (autism spectrum).  It wasn't unpleasant to spend the evening with him, just very different.  And I normally hold onto my Friday night routine religiously to help me recover from the week.  On top of that, Scott's team had a soccer game.  I haven't watched a soccer game in a super long time.  I took the young man from schoo with me to the game.  It just felt surreal.
     Got up Saturday morning and headed to Leavenworth where I got to spend some time with my family and go to Ryan's wedding.  Though it didn't feel surreal at the time, it was very brief so I keep thinking, "Did I really spend time with Leah? and my Dad and Mom?  Did I really watch a wedding and dance the electric slide?"  Oh my goodness--Liam was so hilarious!  They took off his shirt so he just had on his vest and he danced in the strobe lights and he was really good!  He's not even two!  The wedding was very nice and the dinner good and the dance fun.  Samantha and her step dad had prepared a very entertaining father daughter dance that touched me and also made me laugh.
      But before the night got done, I got a call from the house mom at Homestead.  Big issues with one of the gals.  She wanted to leave.  So I said I'd come pick her up which I did--at midnight, after talking to the Director on the phone most of the way home.  This morning, I didn't get my quiet time or have any of my routine because we got up early and went to the church for Inside Out which is where the entire church goes out into the community to do missions.  I went with a group door to door to hand out cinnamon rolls and invite people to church int he neighborhood surrounding the church.  This also wasn't an unpleasant experience, but it felt surreal.  The Homestead gal came home with me and she is unlike anyone I know.  I don't know how to help her at all and she wants to be better immediately and desperately.  I know God can help her but He is taking His sweet time.  We spent the entire afternoon trying to come to some resolution to her situation and we got absolutely nowhere.  A full circle.  I handed her off to another volunteer so I could get some perspective and downtime before tomorrow's work week starts.  So 5 really different activities all packed into one weekend.  I am ready for my normal routine and work week so I can relax!

Alone but not Lonely

     I was just discussing this over email--how when you have the option of being with people, but chose not to, you aren't lonely.  Sometimes I really like being alone.  Its probably that selfish part of me--I like to do whatever I want when I want and that feels like an extravagance after being married for 28 years and being a parent for 24 years.
     Scott left for Georgia with his soccer team early Thursday morning.  Of course, Thursday and Friday I did my regular routine--get up and ready, go to work, come home and nap with the pups, watch Ellen, go work out, come home, eat, then read and go to bed.  Well, Friday I had my nap after work then Jon and his friend Cesar came by and spent about an hour with me.  I enjoyed that--they are fun, sweet young men.  Then I went to my step class which feels a bit like a family, and when I got out to the car, I saw Joel had called.  I called and chatted with him for almost an hour sitting in the car with a lovely breeze blowing through the car.  We laughed a lot.  I was looking forward to my traditional Friday night Chipoltle, which I also don't mind doing alone, but decided after my bath to run out to the football game to see if Adelle won the car for perfect attendance.  I walked up at the perfect time--3 minutes left in the first half, and they were doing the giveaway right at that end of the stadium!  I stood by the fence and Rose waited with me and I was able to talk to Adelle both before and after the giveaway.  She didn't win.  She was disappointed but we talked about it briefly and then she cheered right up when I said I was coming to get her Saturday and we'd spend the whole afternoon. That was an amazing feeling, to know I am that important to someone. Blesses me deeply.  I then thoroughly enjoyed my Chipotle which I ate sitting outside the coffee shop reading my book.  I topped it off with a sugar free vanilla steamer then hurried home to my puppies who aren't used to being alone so much.  I spent the rest of the evening reading on the back deck.  Wonderful!
     Then this morning I got up and had a text from my friend at work, LouAnn, to see if I wanted some apples and pears.  She came right over and delivered them and took a quick tour of the house!  I LOVE the people I work with.  The new counselor, Angela is a ton of fun as is the new psychologist, Nathan, and the new nurse, Erica.  I like the new resource teachers, too.  A bunch of people have stepped up to help with FCA this year, too.  I just feel sooooo blessed to have these people along with my sweet Mary, and Greg and Marvin to spend time with.  I actually missed them this summer!  What a true blessing.
    Also this week, met with the Homestead gal again and felt so blessed and honored to be a part of her recovery.  She is so open to our love and to God's love, neither of which has she ever experienced.  She is absolutely soaking it all up.  She is MAJORLY struggling with addiction, depression, anxiety, and huge loss, having given up absolutely all that seemed "normal" to her and changing everything in her life to come here and make a new start.  She is EXACTLY the person we designed Homestead for and is carving the way for more girls to come.  Pray for her complete restoration--she has a heart's desire to help girls get out of the industry.   I just know God is going to heal and restore her and use her for this purpose.
    God is sooooo good!

Quiet Time, etc.

     I officially started back to work this week.  I am now ready.  We had the largest group of kids at Camp Dewey ever!  Turns out we are up 125 kids!  My caseload is going to be huge!  I have met and like all the new staff, had lunch with Angela, the new counselor, and am feeling really good about all of that.  This year we can take our own computers so I will take my laptop for now and then purchase either an ipad or a mac and take it to work with me!  I like my hair and the couple of new clothes items and shoes which always helps with the school start up, too.
     I got Adelle yesterday and she was challenging!  We came over to the house and she did her facebook and Youtube while I read.  I needed to run some more errands so I gave her the two more songs warning.  When we were ready to go, she said she'd listen to one more song while I was in the bathroom (she knows me well).  When I came out, she hadn't started one yet and was getting ready to start a 4 minute song!  So I told her we were going.  She started fussing and wouldn't drop it.  She whined all the way through Bed Bath and Beyond and the Pet Store.  She was mad in the car that I hadn't brought a pad of paper for her to make a list on and then wanted me to buy one for her.  She wanted Orange Leaf and we are trying to limit her sugar intake but I did cave on that and let her get a little one.  Then at Menard's she wanted a drink and kept whining.  I had to be so firm that she finally felt bad and gave me a hug.  It was intense!  She needs to start school and get back in her routine!
     These pics are of my wonderful quiet time that continues even though it is shorter and much earlier now.  I take my breakfast out on the deck (the dogs love it out there and stay up on the deck!).  I read my devotion and do my memorization (I have been doing this for about 6 months now but am now memorizing the 50 verses everyone should know that we will be doing in FCA this year....  I never thought my old brain could do this but I am doing fine!)  Then I do my prayer journal.  I pray for the kids every day and then divide up all the other things to pray for throughout the week--family, Bible study friends, the world, healing, school and clients, my kids' friends, missionaries, and Homestead.  Thursday is Thankful Thursday!
     I forgot to mention that we have two girls at Homestead!  I am so excited!  I met one, a gal who was on the street for two days and then rescued, and a girl from New Jersey.  We start small group on Tuesday night. I am so excited for that!  Pray hard for these girls and the 4 more that will come.
     This picture is my quiet time area and the other is of the new plants I bought and repotted for out there.

     Emily's shower today!  Have a great day!

Vets

     I've changed vets three times now since Kevin died.  I have such a strong aversion to going to the vet.  I started at the one here in town that Kevin recommended before he died when Professor was sick and his xray machine was down.  He talked me through it on the phone but they still ended up gouging me for a ton of money.  Kevin kept them from cutting Professor open, though.  So after he died, I called around and ended up at a vet in Wamego.  All vets except Kevin as such shisters!  They did a full exam every time I went in there even if I just wanted a stupid cortizone shot for the dog.  I don't think Kevin did a full exam but maybe once on each dog in their whole lives.  If something was wrong, they got a cortizone shot.  Kevin did save Rex's eyes once, though, by sewing them shut.  I loved the way Kevin neutered the dogs.  Everyone else I knew took their dogs in and left them anywhere from 1-3 days and paid tons of money.  Kevin would walk out into the waiting room, give the dog a shot, and warn you they were going to puke.  The second they puked, Kevin would whisk up the barf with a paper towel.  He'd the poke the dog in the eye.  If he didn't blink, he was ready for surgery.  Kevin took the dog in the other room for like 3 minutes then bring it back to me.  He'd tell me how to roll the dogs legs back and forth to help it wake up.  Then he'd poke it in the eye again and when it blinked, it was time to go home.  He charged next to nothing.
     The vet in Wamego tried to guilt me into doing more for the dogs, for example, he wanted to put them under and clean their teeth--$180!  Kevin just yanked their teeth when they rotted out and said to feed them softer food if they quit eating.  The last time I took Rex to see Kevin, he gave Rex a shot then took him back to pull his tooth and Leah and i heard this crazy, loud moaning sound.  I asked Kevin if I could go back there and he said yes.  He grinned as Rex moaned and said Rex was anesthesia resistant so he gave him another shot.  He ended up pulling 8 teeth.  So I try to explain this to the new vet and I think she thinks I'm slightly insane.
    So yesterday as I was thinking about what I wanted to have done at the new vet (I'm trying out one closer to us)and playing out scenarios in my mind of how to advocate for fewer services (like not bringing in a fecal sample for the recommended intestine test--their intestines are fine!  And if Kevin had any doubt, he'd put a q tip up there and get his own sample!).  As I played these scenarios out in my mind, I was getting more and more worked up and before I knew it, I was in tears.  I felt mad at Kevin for leaving us to have to go through this.  And I felt guilty for taking Kevin for granted all these years.  I miss him.
    The new vet worked out fine.  They didn't guilt me into any extra tests and had a reasonable solution to Professor's itchy skin to try.  She may think I'm slightly crazy, though.  I don't think there are any vets left in the world like Kevin.